Compromise

"Come near to God and He will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded."

---James 4.8

"You shall have no other gods before me."

---Exodus 20.3

I read an article from Christianity Today over the weekend that made me stop and think. It was by a pastor who chose to remain anonymous. He told of many years of leading retreats and speaking in churches all over the country. The pastor remembered fondly the cheers of approval he would receive as he spoke eloquently on any variety of spiritual disciplines, the crying eyes as people flooded the altars, the pleading invitations to come back as soon as possible to bless the body of Christ again. He also spoke of the rampant pornography that was, literally, tearing his soul apart. The evenings alone in strange towns when he would go to strip clubs, peep shows and x-rated movies. The magazines that would find their way into his carry-on bag at the airport. The visuals that would flood his mind, even as he preached holiness in the pulpits of these churches.

Over time, this respected leader felt like he was going crazy, unable to control these ungodly images. Finally, at a conference with many other pastors, he said to himself that enough was enough. He sat down with one of his mentors, a pastor only identified in the article as leading one of the largest churches in the South, and began to confess, detail by sordid detail, all he had done. The mentor could only wail and sob. It turns out that he had been savaged by lust and pornography as well. He began to unravel a life full of every type of sexual perversion. He showed the author a list of medications he took to fight the venerial diseases he'd picked up along the way. And he also laid out on the table the divorce papers his wife had recently filed.

It's easy to point a judgmental finger at these pastors and blame them and their "kind" for all that's wrong with the church. But more and more, as I grow in God, I'm seeing areas of my life where I've lived as a double-minded man. Little compromises to the teachings I know are in the Word that I justify by saying things like, "Jesus wouldn't want me to be unhappy, right?" or "Come on, I can do this and that. I mean, the kingdom's all about grace, isn't it?". I've said it in fun before, but it seems more real with time - It's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission. We look at the world around us, how much fun everything seems to be, how "cool" we dream about being, and we start to follow those around us, instead of the precepts Jesus wants us to base all our decisions on. Allowing the world to "squeeze us into its mold" (Romans 12:2 paraphrase), watering down doctrine and taking the teeth out the Bibles we carry around all the time, is bad enough. What kind of life will this type of fence-walking create? What's the result of it?

Well, look at the pastors in the story. The author speaks of feeling mentally unstable. The elder pastor was literally destroyed - physically, financially, emotionally. James chapter 1 describes a man like this as "double-minded" and "unstable in ALL he does". It may seem like we can keep our two lives separated. Eventually, it will come to disrupt everything. You know the old addage, "One bad apple spoils the whole bunch?" It's true. Buy a bag of apples, put one rotten one in there, close it off and let it sit for a week. I guarantee you won't want to eat what you find in that bag. No one can serve two masters, Jesus said.

In 1Kings 17, the nation of Israel was sent into captivity for compromising the Law God had given them. They saw nothing wrong with honoring God and the pagan worship of the nations around them. Eventually, the deception was passed down. Verse 41b says, "...To this day their children and grandchildren continue to do as their fathers did." God said in the Ten Commandments that He would punish three generations down of those who worship false idols. Jesus quoted from Deuteronomy when He confronted the devil in the desert, "It is written, 'Worship the Lord your God and serve Him only'." Daily, Satan comes at us like he came at Jesus, dangling the carrot of compromise in front of us. Some things, obviously, we are going to shoot down right away. But we make agreements on things that are "harmless", at least on the surface. "There's nothing in the Scripture about - whatever - and it's what I want. So I'm going for it." But often there's a slippery slope at work. Little by little, agreement by agreement, we soon find ourselves in a place we barely recognize. Out and out sin, once crouching at our door, now takes up full residence. What we once were repulsed by is just another choice. We become unable to pray with power. We attend church and it seems hollow and empty. The Bible that once spoke with passion, now barely gives off a whimper.

If you're like I used to be, you're reading this and saying, "This is great. But no one can attain that! I'm not a monk or a nun!". Obviously, I'm not either. But you know what my idea of abundant life is? A life I don't have to apologize to anyone for. One I don't have to make excuses for to my kids. A life that is the same inside me as it is outside me. It's about purging all the "little foxes" that have been stealing my peace, joy and hope for years. It's about truth in the inward parts. Letting God into every (I mean EVERY) inch of my life and having God dismantle it piece by piece and then, like the potter we see in Jeremiah 18, build it up in a way that is pleasing to Him.

The anonymous author in the article I read this weekend got it right. We read how he humbled himself before God, repented for a long season, sought forgiveness of family and friends, and found healing. May those who are in the depths of deep sin, depravity and addiction get out before, like the author's mentor, it's too late. May those who are dancing on the edge of the pit come alive in the power of His spirit, resist at all costs, and overcome. And, ultimately, may we become a generation not afraid to stand up for what our hearts know is right, no matter what the cost.