Friday, April 8
6:06 AM MDT
Frontier Ranch, Buena Vista, CO
Ogalala building main lounge
Well, I’ve got about 36 hours to recap. Fact is, everything’s been going so fast, I haven’t even had time to sit and write it all down, much less type it here. So, here goes (as best as I can remember it):
The flight to Minneapolis was pretty long. 3+ hours. Good meal at Chili’s in the airport. The flight to Colorado Springs was fun. Sat next to Danny, helped him (I think) with his studying. The flight attendant, Sherry, was a Christian. Neat southern girl from Kentucky. Goose Gossage was on the flight! Larry was all excited about that. He talked to him for a few seconds at the baggage claim. Still had the big mustache. Then, when we got to our hotel room, they showed highlights of Gossage on ESPN! Whoa! Deja vu!
Read Song of Solomon on the plane. What an awesome picture of God’s love for us. When the ruler talks about his beautiful maiden - that’s God singing love songs to US! We’re used to saying words of praise and adoration to God. But He says them back to us! He woos us. He beckons for us. He longs for us. Oh, that this weekend would be full of revelation of the Father’s love.
Now when we landed, it was nearly 10pm (or midnight our time). So everything was dark. When we woke up yesterday morning, bright blue skies and the ROCKIES!!!!! WOW!!!! We could see Pike’s Peak from our hotel parking lot. But that was just for starters. We played Patty Jewett Golf Course in Colorado Springs. The nine holes we played were built in 1898. More than 85,000 rounds were played there last year. I can see why. You see Pike’s Peak on every hole. I hope the picture Danny snapped of me on the seventh hole came out! Me in the tee box with the mountain behind me. I played pretty well, all things considered. I love playing in the higher elevation. Sixth hole. Par 3. 148 yards. Up the hill. Into the wind. NINE IRON! Pin high! Off the right side. I hit the ball straight, mostly. Almost drove the fifth green. Still made bogey. I made three pars but still shot 49. That’s not so great. The greens were very fast, and I was playing with a 50 cent putter. No feel at all. I really missed my sand wedge (especially in the trap on #8) and my putter. I need to get new ones for the new set. I had low score that day by two over Ben. Then I ate fish tacos at the restaurant. Not as good as Mamasita’s in Costa Maya, but good. Then, the real adventure began.
As we drove out route 24 toward Buena Vista, you drive into the Arkansas river valley. It seemed like every time we came around a pass, the view of the mountains got better and better! I hope the pictures with my little disposable came out. You have to look at them. I can’t describe the way they look at all and do them justice. Let’s just say my nose was glued to the window and my jaw was hanging open. Fittingly, Ben chose tunes from Hillsongs “Hope” as we were going through the pass. I’ll never hear “Need You Here”, “Hope” or “Still” again without falling to my knees in worship of the Creator. In reverence at the foot of Mt. Princeton, “I will be still and know you are God”.
We arrived at the Ranch (with Bob doing close to 100 MPH in some spots!) around 4:30 yesterday. What a great place! Nestled against the side of a tall cliff, sheltered from a lot of sun (which is good considering I never put sunscreen on at the golf course. My head is a freaking turnip!) The elevation is getting to me a little. Our cabin, Ogalala, is on the steep part of the hill. I’m winded just climbing up to it. Then, we’re on the third floor. Oh, man! I may not be doing much hiking this week. I’ll barf up a lung.
We talked to a guy from Murphysboro, TN at dinner. He said his group (5 or 7 guys, I’m not sure) have tried to get in for the last three years. The first two, none of them got in. The third year, this year, he’s the only one who got in! The six of us were downright amazed! How did we all make it on the first try? We don’t know; but we do know God is in this. He has a very specific plan for each of us this weekend. Danny felt Wednesday night that it was right that the six of us were all together. I think that confirms that.
Then, the first session. John showed three trailers - Baggar Vance, The Lord of the Rings (#1), and Saving Private Ryan. Then started laying out the ground work for the first night. I started to cry when John started talking. Not over what he said, necessarily. But just that I was actually here. And that God made a way. I took a few things out of last night. Number one is I need to fight more for my girls and my wife. I notice how when Tricia is confronted by a tough situation, I try to encourage her to stand up and deal with it. And maybe sometimes she has to. But I need to rescue my beauty. I need to step up and be a man. When I’m confronted by a tough situation in the exam room, I need to stand strong and be firm. No caving in if it’s not warranted. Tough with Dr. Vertucci. (Editor's note: Dr. Vertucci is a tough, anxiety filled patient I've been dealing with since January. Upon returning to work, I was firm with him regarding what he needed to do. He told me I was right, that he couldn't do it, and returned them.) Tough with any one who tries to take over. Let them feel the weight of my anointing and deal with it. And the last question of the night - “Why am I here?” What would I want Jesus to do for me?
Let’s regroup. Three years ago, I was working at Labor Ready, ready to just about kill myself. Miserable. No life. No joy. I was literally existing. Here I am now. Wild, unfettered and free. Well, more free. I still have a long way to go. Maybe that’s what I want God to show me this weekend. I’m on the right track, there’s no doubt. I’m getting it right. But I want a report card. Jesus, let’s go through every area where we’ve been working and do an assessment. Do I get A’s? C’s? Hopefully, no F’s! I looked at myself in the mirror yesterday. I like who I see. I’m really becoming comfortable with myself, now that the real me, the one God intended for, is coming to the surface. But how am I really doing? I’m at a checkpoint. Let’s take stock. Where am I going from here? How far is the next part of the journey? What will I need to lose? What will I need to gain? Where am I going? Am I venturing into new waters now? A year? Five years? Where is my writing in all this? Music? Hearing aids?
God, I lay myself bare before the One to whom I must give account. I thank you so much for Bob’s care for my spiritual man. That He saw fit not only to hire me, but to set me on the journey that I’ll be forever grateful to him for. Jesus, I know what you think of me. I read it in Song of Solomon Wednesday night. That’s the big picture. But what about these little battles? The process of the journey into my true heart. How am I doing? I want you to say you’re pleased with my work so far. But I want you to be honest. Show me the good, the bad and the ugly. Convict me if I’m still holding on to the old ways. Confirm in me the new ways. Read my mail from A to Z and send me on the next part of the journey with excitement and power.
Thank you for my ability to write. Thank you for my love of music - playing, listening and worshipping. Thank you for my sense of humor. My ability to turn a funny phrase. But also a depth to my thinking that I remember begging for when I was going to be a pastor. Thank you that time is truly a great teacher. And that you protected me and your church from the works of a sinful, self-centered young man.
He must increase and I must decrease. I think that’s one area I’m still lacking. Putting the needs of others over my own. I’d still rather get my own instead of serving. Help me with that.
Show me, deeper and deeper, where I’m going. What I need to do. The good, the bad, and the ugly. What a day ahead.
And finally, what about the Father’s Day thing? I need to do it, don’t I? OK, I’ll work on that later. I want insights from the Boot Camp to make their way into that. Help me be transparent to do so. Men are counting on it. They’re counting on me. I need you.
No comments:
Post a Comment